一个在爱的人不会讨论责任～出自-克里希那穆提

班若若班

First of all, there is no such thing as being isolated. To be is to be related and without relationship there is no existence. What do we mean by relationship? It is an interconnected challenge and response between two people, between you and me, the challenge which you throw out and which I accept or to which I respond; also the challenge I throw out to you. The relationship of two people creates society; society is not independent of you and me; the mass is not by itself a separate entity but you and I in our relationship to each other create the mass, the group, the society.
首先，并没有“孤立”这回事。存在即进入关系，没有关系就没有生活。我们所谓的关系是什么意思？它是两个人之间相互的挑战和回应。你和我之间，你发出挑战，我接受或作出回应；同样我也对你发出挑战。两个人的关系制造了社会；社会不是独立于你我存在的；大众不是一个孤立存在的实体，而是你和我在我们的关系中制造了大众、集体和社会。

Relationship is the awareness of interconnection between two people. What is that relationship generally based on? Is it not based on so-called interdependence, mutual assistance? At least, we say it is mutual help, mutual aid and so on, but actually, apart from words, apart from the emotional screen which we throw up against each other, what is it based upon? On mutual gratification, is it not? If I do not please you, you get rid of me; if I please you, you accept me either as your wife or as your neighbour or as your friend. That is the fact.
关系就是对两个人的交互联结的觉察。通常这种关系基于什么？它基于所谓的相互依赖、相互帮助吗？至少，我们说是相互帮助、相互协助等，但实际上抛开语言、抛开我们互相设置的感情屏障，它基于什么？基于相互的满足，不是吗？如果我不取悦你，你就会抛弃我；如果我取悦你，你就接纳我为你的妻子、邻居或朋友。事实就是如此。

What is it that you call the family? Obviously it is a relationship of intimacy, of communion. In your family, in your relationship with your wife, with your husband, is there communion? Surely that is what we mean by relationship, do we not? Relationship means communion without fear, freedom to understand each other, to communicate directly. Obviously relationship means that - to be in communion with another. Are you? Are you in communion with your wife?
你称之为家庭的东西是什么？显然，那是一种亲密、共享的关系。在你的家庭中，在你与妻子或丈夫的关系中，存在交融吗？显然那就是我们所指的关系，不是吗？关系意味着没有恐惧的共享，意味着互相了解的自由，意味着直截了当的交流。显然关系意味着——与他人融合。你是这样的吗？你与妻子是融合的吗？First of all, there is no such thing as being isolated. To be is to be related and without relationship there is no existence. What do we mean by relationship? It is an interconnected challenge and response between two people, between you and me, the challenge which you throw out and which I accept or to which I respond; also the challenge I throw out to you. The relationship of two people creates society; society is not independent of you and me; the mass is not by itself a separate entity but you and I in our relationship to each other create the mass, the group, the society.
首先，并没有“孤立”这回事。存在即进入关系，没有关系就没有生活。我们所谓的关系是什么意思？它是两个人之间相互的挑战和回应。你和我之间，你发出挑战，我接受或作出回应；同样我也对你发出挑战。两个人的关系制造了社会；社会不是独立于你我存在的；大众不是一个孤立存在的实体，而是你和我在我们的关系中制造了大众、集体和社会。

Relationship is the awareness of interconnection between two people. What is that relationship generally based on? Is it not based on so-called interdependence, mutual assistance? At least, we say it is mutual help, mutual aid and so on, but actually, apart from words, apart from the emotional screen which we throw up against each other, what is it based upon? On mutual gratification, is it not? If I do not please you, you get rid of me; if I please you, you accept me either as your wife or as your neighbour or as your friend. That is the fact.
关系就是对两个人的交互联结的觉察。通常这种关系基于什么？它基于所谓的相互依赖、相互帮助吗？至少，我们说是相互帮助、相互协助等，但实际上抛开语言、抛开我们互相设置的感情屏障，它基于什么？基于相互的满足，不是吗？如果我不取悦你，你就会抛弃我；如果我取悦你，你就接纳我为你的妻子、邻居或朋友。事实就是如此。

What is it that you call the family? Obviously it is a relationship of intimacy, of communion. In your family, in your relationship with your wife, with your husband, is there communion? Surely that is what we mean by relationship, do we not? Relationship means communion without fear, freedom to understand each other, to communicate directly. Obviously relationship means that - to be in communion with another. Are you? Are you in communion with your wife?
你称之为家庭的东西是什么？显然，那是一种亲密、共享的关系。在你的家庭中，在你与妻子或丈夫的关系中，存在交融吗？显然那就是我们所指的关系，不是吗？关系意味着没有恐惧的共享，意味着互相了解的自由，意味着直截了当的交流。显然关系意味着——与他人融合。你是这样的吗？你与妻子是融合的吗？

Perhaps you are physically but that is not relationship. You and your wife live on opposite sides of a wall of isolation, do you not? You have your own pursuits, your ambitions, and she has hers. You live behind the wall and occasionally look over the top - and that you call relationship. That is a fact, is it not? You may enlarge it, soften it, introduce a new set of words to describe it. But that is the fact - that you and another live in isolation, and that life in isolation you call relationship.
也许你们在身体上交融，但那并不是关系。你和你的妻子生活在一道孤立之墙的两边，不是吗？你有你的追求、你的野心，她有她的。你生活在墙后，偶尔眺望另一边——而那就是你所谓的关系。事实就是如此，不是吗？也许你会扩大它、柔化它，引用一套新的词汇去描述它。但事实就是如此——即你和另一个人彼此孤立，而你把那种孤立的生活称之为关系。

If there is real relationship between two people, which means there is communion between them, then the implications are enormous. Then there is no isolation; there is love and not responsibility or duty. It is the people who are isolated behind their walls who talk about duty and responsibility. A man who loves does not talk about responsibility - he loves. Therefore he shares with another his joy, his sorrow, his money. Are your families such? Is there direct communion with your wife, with your children? Obviously not.
如果两个人之间有真正的关系，即彼此之间存在交融，那关系就寓意非凡。那时，就不会有孤立；那时，就会有爱，而不是责任或义务。只有那些孤立于高墙之后的人，才会谈论责任和义务。一个在爱的人，不会谈论责任——他只是爱。因此，他与另一半分享他的欢乐、他的悲伤、他的钱财。你们的家庭是这样的吗？你与妻子、与孩子之间存在直接的融合吗？显然没有。

Therefore the family is merely an excuse to continue your name or tradition, to give you what you want, sexually or psychologically, so the family becomes a means of self-perpetuation, of carrying on your name. That is one kind of immortality, one kind of permanency. The family is also used as a means of gratification. I exploit others ruthlessly in the business world, in the political or social world outside, and at home I try to be kind and generous. How absurd! Or the world is too much for me, I want peace and I go home. I suffer in the world and I go home and try to find comfort. So I use relationship as a means of gratification, which means I do not want to be disturbed by my relationship.
因此，家庭只是延续你的姓氏或传统的借口，只是为了满足你的需要——性的需要或心理First of all, there is no such thing as being isolated. To be is to be related and without relationship there is no existence. What do we mean by relationship? It is an interconnected challenge and response between two people, between you and me, the challenge which you throw out and which I accept or to which I respond; also the challenge I throw out to you. The relationship of two people creates society; society is not independent of you and me; the mass is not by itself a separate entity but you and I in our relationship to each other create the mass, the group, the society.
首先，并没有“孤立”这回事。存在即进入关系，没有关系就没有生活。我们所谓的关系是什么意思？它是两个人之间相互的挑战和回应。你和我之间，你发出挑战，我接受或作出回应；同样我也对你发出挑战。两个人的关系制造了社会；社会不是独立于你我存在的；大众不是一个孤立存在的实体，而是你和我在我们的关系中制造了大众、集体和社会。

Relationship is the awareness of interconnection between two people. What is that relationship generally based on? Is it not based on so-called interdependence, mutual assistance? At least, we say it is mutual help, mutual aid and so on, but actually, apart from words, apart from the emotional screen which we throw up against each other, what is it based upon? On mutual gratification, is it not? If I do not please you, you get rid of me; if I please you, you accept me either as your wife or as your neighbour or as your friend. That is the fact.
关系就是对两个人的交互联结的觉察。通常这种关系基于什么？它基于所谓的相互依赖、相互帮助吗？至少，我们说是相互帮助、相互协助等，但实际上抛开语言、抛开我们互相设置的感情屏障，它基于什么？基于相互的满足，不是吗？如果我不取悦你，你就会抛弃我；如果我取悦你，你就接纳我为你的妻子、邻居或朋友。事实就是如此。

What is it that you call the family? Obviously it is a relationship of intimacy, of communion. In your family, in your relationship with your wife, with your husband, is there communion? Surely that is what we mean by relationship, do we not? Relationship means communion without fear, freedom to understand each other, to communicate directly. Obviously relationship means that - to be in communion with another. Are you? Are you in communion with your wife?
你称之为家庭的东西是什么？显然，那是一种亲密、共享的关系。在你的家庭中，在你与妻子或丈夫的关系中，存在交融吗？显然那就是我们所指的关系，不是吗？关系意味着没有恐惧的共享，意味着互相了解的自由，意味着直截了当的交流。显然关系意味着——与他人融合。你是这样的吗？你与妻子是融合的吗？

Perhaps you are physically but that is not relationship. You and your wife live on opposite sides of a wall of isolation, do you not? You have your own pursuits, your ambitions, and she has hers. You live behind the wall and occasionally look over the top - and that you call relationship. That is a fact, is it not? You may enlarge it, soften it, introduce a new set of words to describe it. But that is the fact - that you and another live in isolation, and that life in isolation you call relationship.
也许你们在身体上交融，但那并不是关系。你和你的妻子生活在一道孤立之墙的两边，不是吗？你有你的追求、你的野心，她有她的。你生活在墙后，偶尔眺望另一边——而那就是你所谓的关系。事实就是如此，不是吗？也许你会扩大它、柔化它，引用一套新的词汇去描述它。但事实就是如此——即你和另一个人彼此孤立，而你把那种孤立的生活称之为关系。

If there is real relationship between two people, which means there is communion between them, then the implications are enormous. Then there is no isolation; there is love and not responsibility or duty. It is the people who are isolated behind their walls who talk about duty and responsibility. A man who loves does not talk about responsibility - he loves. Therefore he shares with another his joy, his sorrow, his money. Are your families such? Is there direct communion with your wife, with your children? Obviously not.
如果两个人之间有真正的关系，即彼此之间存在交融，那关系就寓意非凡。那时，就不会有孤立；那时，就会有爱，而不是责任或义务。只有那些孤立于高墙之后的人，才会谈论责任和义务。一个在爱的人，不会谈论责任——他只是爱。因此，他与另一半分享他的欢乐、他的悲伤、他的钱财。你们的家庭是这样的吗？你与妻子、与孩子之间存在直接的融合吗？显然没有。

Therefore the family is merely an excuse to continue your name or tradition, to give you what you want, sexually or psychologically, so the family becomes a means of self-perpetuation, of carrying on your name. That is one kind of immortality, one kind of permanency. The family is also used as a means of gratification. I exploit others ruthlessly in the business world, in the political or social world outside, and at home I try to be kind and generous. How absurd! Or the world is too much for me, I want peace and I go home. I suffer in the world and I go home and try to find comfort. So I use relationship as a means of gratification, which means I do not want to be disturbed by my relationship.
因此，家庭只是延续你的姓氏或传统的借口，只是为了满足你的需要——性的需要或心理上的需要。所以，家庭成了传宗接代、延续香火的途径。那是另一种不朽，另一种永恒。家庭也成了满足自我的途径。我在商界、政界或社会上无情地剥削他人；而在家里，我却试图表现得仁慈慷慨。这多么荒谬！或者，因为世界太残酷，我想要安宁，于是我就回到家里。我在外界受苦，于是就回家寻求安慰。所以我利用关系满足自己，也就是说我不想被我的关系所打扰。上的需要。所以，家庭成了传宗接代、延续香火的途径。那是另一种不朽，另一种永恒。家庭也成了满足自我的途径。我在商界、政界或社会上无情地剥削他人；而在家里，我却试图表现得仁慈慷慨。这多么荒谬！或者，因为世界太残酷，我想要安宁，于是我就回到家里。我在外界受苦，于是就回家寻求安慰。所以我利用关系满足自己，也就是说我不想被我的关系所打扰。

Perhaps you are physically but that is not relationship. You and your wife live on opposite sides of a wall of isolation, do you not? You have your own pursuits, your ambitions, and she has hers. You live behind the wall and occasionally look over the top - and that you call relationship. That is a fact, is it not? You may enlarge it, soften it, introduce a new set of words to describe it. But that is the fact - that you and another live in isolation, and that life in isolation you call relationship.
也许你们在身体上交融，但那并不是关系。你和你的妻子生活在一道孤立之墙的两边，不是吗？你有你的追求、你的野心，她有她的。你生活在墙后，偶尔眺望另一边——而那就是你所谓的关系。事实就是如此，不是吗？也许你会扩大它、柔化它，引用一套新的词汇去描述它。但事实就是如此——即你和另一个人彼此孤立，而你把那种孤立的生活称之为关系。

If there is real relationship between two people, which means there is communion between them, then the implications are enormous. Then there is no isolation; there is love and not responsibility or duty. It is the people who are isolated behind their walls who talk about duty and responsibility. A man who loves does not talk about responsibility - he loves. Therefore he shares with another his joy, his sorrow, his money. Are your families such? Is there direct communion with your wife, with your children? Obviously not.
如果两个人之间有真正的关系，即彼此之间存在交融，那关系就寓意非凡。那时，就不会有孤立；那时，就会有爱，而不是责任或义务。只有那些孤立于高墙之后的人，才会谈论责任和义务。一个在爱的人，不会谈论责任——他只是爱。因此，他与另一半分享他的欢乐、他的悲伤、他的钱财。你们的家庭是这样的吗？你与妻子、与孩子之间存在直接的融合吗？显然没有。

Therefore the family is merely an excuse to continue your name or tradition, to give you what you want, sexually or psychologically, so the family becomes a means of self-perpetuation, of carrying on your name. That is one kind of immortality, one kind of permanency. The family is also used as a means of gratification. I exploit others ruthlessly in the business world, in the political or social world outside, and at home I try to be kind and generous. How absurd! Or the world is too much for me, I want peace and I go home. I suffer in the world and I go home and try to find comfort. So I use relationship as a means of gratification, which means I do not want to be disturbed by my relationship.
因此，家庭只是延续你的姓氏或传统的借口，只是为了满足你的需要——性的需要或心理上的需要。所以，家庭成了传宗接代、延续香火的途径。那是另一种不朽，另一种永恒。家庭也成了满足自我的途径。我在商界、政界或社会上无情地剥削他人；而在家里，我却试图表现得仁慈慷慨。这多么荒谬！或者，因为世界太残酷，我想要安宁，于是我就回到家里。我在外界受苦，于是就回家寻求安慰。所以我利用关系满足自己，也就是说我不想被我的关系所打扰。

流浪的萤火虫

感谢分享 继续关注